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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

What’s it about?
New York is under the thumb of a heavily armed gang (clan) called the Foot. Four mutated teenagers (spoiler – they’re evolved from turtles) fight back and get caught up in a series of implausible events. It’s worse than it sounds.

What did we think?
Anthony Sherratt says: The new TMNT movie is a cynical attempt to position a franchise for a new younger audience. Sadly it does so at the expense of the existing fanbase by serving up a flimsy, overly childish plot that is too simple for adults and laden with positively cringe-worthy dialogue.

It also pays scant regard to scientific reality and apparently, Splinter is Japanese for “exposition rat”. The retconning of their origin simply beggars belief (and this from a TMNT fan more than happy to accept the basic premise of 6-foot-tall ninja turtles existing).

Without the entertaining one-liners from Michelango this entire movie would be abysmal. Even so, the humour only elevates it to terrible. I only liked three things in this movie: Michelangelo, the fact Shredder is actually badass and the very last shot of the entire debacle referencing the song ‘So Happy Together’ which is, of course, a 60s song released by a band called The Turtles. Sadly this unexpected subtlety is the cleverest part of the entire movie.

There’s an impressive fight scene (singular) but overall this is mindless and occasionally painful. Cowabungle.

The Skeleton Twins

What’s it about?
Twins – estranged for a decade – are brought together through dramatic circumstances and the reunion forces them to examine their lives

What did we think?
Anthony Sherratt says: If there can be such a thing as a beautiful film about depression then this is that movie. Thoughtful, touching and heartbreaking. And wonderful.

Casting talented comedians Bill Hader and Kristen Wiig might seem an odd choice – and any of their fans expecting a comedy may exit traumatised – but they add a gravitas and contrast that only emphasises the gritty, realistic nature of something that touches so many people. Director Craig Johnson manages to avoid preaching or delivering an obvious lesson, instead offering up a sensitive glimpse into everyday dreams and the downs that often accompany them. Closer to real life than some might feel comfortable with but stronger for it.

 

The Maze Runner

What’s it about?
One by one, month after month, teenage boys arrive in a glade, surrounded by a maze. Memories wiped, they only know their names. The lost boys form a society which is rocked by the arrival of Thomas, whose curiosity and natural ability as a ‘runner’ in the maze brings fresh danger, but also the chance of escape.

What did we think?
Francesca says: Based on the YA book by James Dashner, this is director Wes Ball’s first feature length film, and it shows in the sometimes clunky storytelling. However, with fantastic production design, a solid young cast and suspenseful action scenes complete with proper scary monsters, this is a perfectly entertaining film, as long as you don’t think about it too hard (after so many months in the glade, why do all these boys still have such great hair?).

This is based on book one of a trilogy (of course), and is certain to please the Hunger Games crowd, so enjoy and stay tuned for the sequel.

Into the Storm

What it’s about?
A group of storm chasers are shooting a documentary about tornados. Meanwhile, a small town lays in the path of a giant storm.

What did we think?
Andrew says: If you’ve seen Twister then you’ve seen this movie. If you haven’t seen Twister, go rent it from the video store and save your cinema cashola. The plot is weak, acting is pretty lame and the attempt at the “home video” style cinematography is poorly executed. The few tornado scenes where the film’s budget was spent were short-lived and unconvincing. Overall, it blows. Yeah, I went there.

Boyhood

What’s it about?
A boy called Mason literally grows up before our eyes. No, seriously… This film uses the same cast over 12 years.

What did we think?
Elizabeth says: The sheer scope of this film is reason enough to make it compulsory viewing. IT’S 12 YEARS. WITH THE SAME CAST. Apparently not even their contracts could legally cover the whole span of the filming. Boyhood is the closest thing you’ll get to seeing real-life on the big screen without it being a documentary. It doesn’t feel scripted, and yet it is. It doesn’t feel directed, and yet it is – meticulously. Not a lot happens in Hollywood terms… there’s no big climax, no massive turning point, no soaring violin strings or life-altering decisions to make… Here is a film with next to no plot, and yet it’s one of the most compelling offerings to grace our screens in years.

Rock the Casbah

What’s it about?
A French/Arabian co-production in which a family gather after the patriarch dies and secrets are revealed that threaten relationships.

What did we think?
Elizabeth says: Come on guys. Death as a precursor for forced disclosure of dysfunctional secrets has been done. Having the dead guy (a magical Omar Shariff) narrate the funereal action is a gimmick not used frequently enough to differentiate this from any other film of its ilk. It’s all been done – and been done better – before.

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